In the October issue of this newsletter, I began a series on the Four Pillars of Leadership Success. The first pillar is communications and building relationships. That article discussed the subject of influence and persuasion as an important aspect of communications. In this article, we’ll examine the subject of negotiation.
First, we must recognize that there are two basic types of negotiation – win/win and win/lose. Win/lose negotiation is characterized by situations where there is likely a one time transaction and long term relationships are unimportant. Buying a car is an example of a win/lose negotiation. Our objective is simply to get the best deal and “stick it” to the car sales person as much as we can. I never remember buying a car from the same person more than once. Win/lose negotiations are handled much differently than win/win negotiations and is not the subject of this article.
We negotiate all the time in the work place. We negotiate with those who report to us, we negotiate with peers, and we negotiate with our boss. The goal of win/win negotiations is to reach a solution or decision where both parties fell that the outcome is fair and balanced. There are several principles that are important to understand in working towards win/win negotiations.
The first principle of win win negotiations is to begin by finding common ground. Rather than discuss differences it is best to start with what we can agree to. Unless both parties have an incentive to move on, there is no negotiation. Establishing common ground sets the stage for the negotiation.
Here is a real simple example. Your boss comes to you with a project. You agree that it is a worthwhile project and you are the right one to do it. The negotiation with the boss will be around time to complete it and resources that you need. You establish a positive start to the negotiations by accepting the project and showing commitment up front.
A second principle of negotiation is that the higher (or lower) that you start, the more room you have to negotiate as long as your starting point is reasonable. An unreasonable starting point will undermine win win negotiations. For example, it may that time of year to establish objectives and goals for the year. I always found that this was a negotiation process. If your first pass, has a goal that is ridiculously easy, then the boss most likely will end negotiations immediately and assign you a goal. On the other hand, if your fist pass is an absolute stretch, then you are setting your self up for failure. Find a place between absurdly easy and impossible, and start there.
Another principle of win win negotiations is to trade value for value. Avoid giving ground without getting something in return. Likewise, be willing to give something to get something. Using the project assigned by the boss as an example, if you have to work extra hard to meet the deadline that the boss wants, try to get some relief by getting one of your less important projects delayed or assigned to someone else.
If negotiations turn negative or no progress is being made it is always good to back to the common ground that has been established and restate it. At this point, both parties should be willing to discuss other alternatives that are not on the table. Abundance thinking is critical here. In win win negotiations, we are seeking the best solution that benefits both parties. In win lose negotiations, one side is trying to gain at the expense of the other side.
Here is a simple example. A mother is out shopping with her two young children. One of the children finds a piece of candy in the car. The other child sees it also. The outcome of win lose negotiation is that one child would get candy and one would not. In win win negotiation, the mother explores other alternatives. She could split the candy into two pieces or she could tell the children that they each could get a whole piece if they wait until she finishes at the store and buys some more. Once she starts thinking win win, many other alternatives surface. The common ground in this case is that both of the children want a piece of candy.
The ultimate test of a successful win win negotiation is that would be you willing to accept the other side of the deal.
Author Resource:
Ryan Scholz works with leaders whose success is dependent on getting commitment and high performance from others. He is author of Turning Potential into Action: Eight Principles for Creating a Highly Engaged Work Place. For more information, visit his web site at http://www.lead-strat-assoc.com .
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